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PROLOGUE
Missouri - 1889
Sarah was thirteen the night George Smede raped
her. Now, at eighteen, she lived in constant fear that he'd do
it again.
She clearly remembered that night as clearly as
she remembered the night when she and four year old Michael had
been forced to watch George beat and rape her mother, Ellie, into
submission. That was the last Sarah had ever heard a sound come
from Michael's mouth. Never again did her speak, scream or even
utter a small whimper when he cried. For this, Sarah would never
forgive her father.
The carpetbag dropped to the floor with a soft
thud bringing Sarah out of her memories. Ellie knelt down to where
Sarah was sitting before the meager fire in the heart, Michael
in her lap. She took them both into her embrace, rocking them
back and forth as she wept. It had been another one of those nights
when her father had come home drunk and raged at them all. Elllie,
as usual, had defended them, eventually dragging him into their
bedroom so they wouldn't have to witness what would come next.
When at last Ellie pulled away, she looked at them.
Sorrow and weariness wore deep lines around her eyes and Sarah's
heart lurched for what her mother must endure at the hands of
George Smede.
Sarah too in her mother's appearance and grimaced.
Like herself, her dress was tattered and dingy, though showed
rough seems at the bodice where George had repeatedly torn it
to her waist and Ellie quietly had re-stitched it as best she
could. Her sweater was also old and hopelessly stretched beyond
repair, hanging limply from her shoulders. There was a hole in
the elbow and the collar was fraying. Hair that had once been
fair was now graying and lifeless. Ellie had tied it back with
a bit of twine though a bit hung loosely across her face. Sarah
fought the urge to reach up and smooth it back but she knew that
it concealed the fresh bruise that was forming.
"Sarah," Ellie whispered, her eyes taking
in her daughter for the last time. "I can't bear to see your
pain any longer. I
I want you to understand that I love
you very much. And that's why I'm sending you away." Her
voice was low but hurried. She wasn't sure how long George would
sleep this time and she had to get Sarah and Michael out of the
house and on their way as soon as possible.
"Mama, you're comin' with us, right?"
Sarah's voice held panic as her eyes widened.
"No, child. Now listen to me. Now that you're
leaving there's something you need to know." Ellie pulled
a tiny bundle from the carpetbag, loosened the ribbon and pulled
out a small gold locket. Inside were two photographs. One was
of a man Sarah had never seen before. The other was of her mother
as a radiant young woman.
Ellie gazed at the image of the man for a brief
moment before kissing it. Looking back to Sarah, she said, "This
is a man I once loved
still love
very much. His name
is Quintin Miles. He's your father Sarah." Sarah sat stunned
speechless.
"When I realized that I was pregnant I went
to him. It was a bitter pill to swallow after one careless night.
He said he had to think things through, but after several days
without word I went to him. He'd disappeared. No one knew where
he'd gone and his mother was worried sick.
"I gathered my strength and went to my parents.
My mother cried and my father was furious. Their only concern
was for their social position," she spat." I was sent
away to live with cousins her in Missouri. They were paid by my
parents to marry me off. George Smede was their ranch foreman.
In the beginning, he was good to me. But after he lost his job
things changed." Ellie paused then waved her hand in the
air, dismissing the last eighteen years of her life with George.
"Find your father, Sarah. I want him to see
you and know you're his daughter. He can't help but know just
looking into your misty green eyes and raven hair. You're made
in his image." She reached up and brushed her fingers along
Sarah's cheek and smiled wistfully. Hesitantly she looked back
into the carpetbag and pulled out two envelopes. "There is
a letter in the bag for your Aunt Charlotte. Give it to her when
you reach her home. Treat her with respect, Sarah. She's the only
one you can go to. The other letter is for your father."
"Come' with us, Mama," Sarah whispered
quickly. "He can't hurt you anymore if ye'r not here."
"Hush, now. I can't go. My life is here now,
such as it is." She held both of Sarah's hands in her own.
"Now, wakeup Michael. It's time for you to go. There's a
wagon waiting for you at the livery that will take you to the
train. It goes straight through to San Francisco." Handing
Sarah a bit of money she said, "Use some of this to get to
your aunt's house. Her address is on her letter." Finally,
Ellie pulled a small sack from the carpetbag. "There are
sandwiches in here to tide you over until you reach the city.
Now, up with you and be on your way before you miss the train."
Ellie fairly pushed Sarah and the sleepy Michael
out the front door. She couldn't risk George waking up and finding
her gone so she trusted that Sarah would find her own way to the
livery. It wasn't a long walk but she knew it would be a lonely
one. As soon as her babies were off the porch she closed the door
on them, not wanting them to see her tears.
There was a man at the livery waiting just as her
mother had told her. He picked Michael up and put him in the back
of the buckboard beside the carpetbag and helped her up before
climbing into the drivers seat and taking up the reins. The buckboard
bolted forward as the man maneuvered it out of the barn and into
the street. She didn't see her mother staring at them through
teary eyes from behind the shabby curtain as they road away.
CHAPTER ONE
San Francisco - 1889
Sarah was not prepared for the hustle and bustle
of San Francisco when she the stepped off the train, nor the quaint
beauty of her aunt's grand home once she reached it. When she
enquired with a porter for a ride through the city he simply pointed
to a funny looking carriage. She paid their fare and sat in amazement
as the carriage traveled through the city, by underground cable
the driver told her, towards her aunt's house. A short walk delivered
them to her front door where they now stood in trepidation.
The house was unlike anything she'd ever seen before
in her life. Aside from the sheer size of it what amazed her was
the number of leaded glass windows, the detailed eaves, the round
turret-like corners and cone shaped roves of the different sections.
A large porch surrounded the whole ground floor level. At the
sidewalk, huge green hedges were perfectly manicured and, like
the porch, surrounded the boundary of the property. The large
ornate iron gate hung between two large pillars but she could
see the colorful garden with its flowers in full bloom and trellising
vines.
Sarah's heart picked up a beat to think that she
and Michael would be living here for a time, then lurched at the
conditions in which they had left Ellie behind in their house
that was little more than a shack. But she couldn't think of that
now. This was a new beginning for them and as soon as they were
settled she'd work on a way to get her mother to leave Missouri
behind.
With the carpetbag in one hand and Michael's tiny
one in her other, she swung the gate open and stepped into her
aunt's garden. Michael's grip tightened on hers as he looked up
at her with all of the apprehension and anticipation that she
felt too. What would their new life hold in this fine house? Would
they fit in? Setting the carpetbag down on the porch she raised
her hand to knock on the door, knowing they were about to find
the answers to all of their unasked questions.
Within moments the door swung open to reveal a
small Chinese boy, not much older than twelve or thirteen, dressed
in a simple white uniform. His hair was long and pulled back into
a simple braid that hung down his back. Fear rose in Sarah's heart
that her mother had given her the wrong address.
"What you want?" he asked in poor English.
She and Michael stood motionless, panic stricken, as the boy stared
at them intently.
Sarah's voice wavered but the words managed to
come. "Does Charlotte Johnson live here?" She tried
to smile but knew that it didn't reach her eyes.
The boy's eyes narrowed at her and quickly said,
"No work here. You go now." He started to push the door
closed but Sarah found herself holding the door open. Her look
was more intent now.
"I ain't lookin' fer work. I'm lookin' fer
Charlotte Johnson. Does she live here?" she asked again.
"Missy Charlotte not home. You go." He
tried to close the door again, but Sarah would not be put out.
They'd come too far to be thrown out into the street by a boy.
"Where is she? Can we wait for her?"
The boy looked her up and down as if inspecting her.
"What you want with her. I never seen you
before here."
Sarah breathed a sigh of relief when the boy stopped
fighting with the door and listened to her. "We came all
the way from Missour-ah. My Ma wrote that she'd be sendin' us
and Charlotte said she had a bed fer us. She's expectin' us."
"This not boarding house," he said firmly.
"We ain't lookin' ta board. Charlotte is my
Ma's sister. My aunt." With that the boy's expression changed
from that of speculation to one of wholehearted welcome.
"Why you not say so in first place?"
He reached down for the carpetbag and quickly ushered them through
the door. "You wait in parlor. Missy Charlotte come soon."
He slid the parlor door closed and Sarah heard him shuffling down
the hall.
She felt a tug on her skirt and looked down to
Michael, his arms outstretched for her to lift him. She rocked
him in her arms, his face buried in her dirty hair. She could
hear him snuffling as he cried to himself.
She wanted to sit but the furniture was so fine
and delicate looking that she was afraid that she might break
something or stain it with her dingy clothes. So she stood where
she was, aching back and all.
It was a long wait for Charlotte. The boy must
have told her the truth when he said that Charlotte wasn't at
home. She wondered where the woman could have gone.
She looked around the room while they waited. The
windows were large and shaded by lacy white curtains. Heavy velvet
curtains were tied back and framed the windows. There was a large
carpet spread over polished wood floors; the fringe on the edges
was perfectly straight. Delicate pieces of furniture were placed
precisely around the room. The sofa and chairs were positioned
for conversation and upholstered in the same fabric, a deep green
that matched the velvet curtains. They were edged in dark wood,
the backs arching like scared cats while the arms curled over
gracefully. The feet were carved to look like paws.
There was another set of similar chairs situated
in front of the fireplace, which had a huge mantle of dark wood
that was ornately carved. On tables around the room had large
vases filled to overflowing with fresh blooms. Their fragrance
permeated the room and gave life to an otherwise lifeless room.
The walls were covered in a fancy paper with a
cream background and pale pink flowers and large paintings hung
in ornate frames. Some were country scenes and others were of
the ocean. All were signed "CJ".
She didn't know what caused her to look up, but
once she did her mouth dropped open in awe, her breath catching
in her throat. Above her this whole time was a beautiful chandelier.
Teardrop shaped pieces of glass hung from each tiny golden arm.
The daylight that filtered through the windows caught in the glass
and sparkled effortlessly. She pointed up for Michael to see and
his eyes shot open with a gasp. A big smile came to him and he
reached up trying to grasp the glittering gems.
Neither of them heard the parlor door slide open
or saw Charlotte walk into the room. She watched as Sarah and
Michael looked up at the chandelier with wonder in their eyes.
From her sister's letters she doubted if they'd ever seen one
before. Let alone any of the other finer things in life that would
now surround them. She sighed heavily at the thought of being
given the change to show them the wonders in life, as she was
never able to show her own children.
Michael was the first to hear the sign and jumped
with a started in Sarah's arms. Sarah turned to see what he was
looking at and couldn't believe her eyes. Before her stood the
image of her mother, only a bit older.
Charlotte was the first to speak. "I came
as soon as I found out you were here." She walked over to
them with her arms outstretched, headless of the state of their
clothes and bodies. "Yun Hee sent a messenger and I came
at once." She hugged them both tightly then looked down to
both of them. "I trust your trip went smoothly." At
first she thought she saw fear in their eyes then realized it
was astonishment. "Your mother and I were often mistaken
for the other. We fooled many people. One day I'll tell you of
some of our antics." Charlotte stepped away from them and
motioned to the sofa. "Come and sit with me. I would like
to hear about your trip." She sat and patted the seat next
to her.
Sarah tried to put Michael down, but he refused
to let her go. So she sat with him on her lap. And feeling self-conscious
herself, she sat silently as well.
Charlotte's Voice was sweet and kind as she spoke
and in no time Sarah was speaking with her as if she'd known her
all her life. The resemblance to her own mother probably helped
her in the transition. "Tell me of your journey. Was it fun?"
She looked down to Michael and smiled broadly, hoping to hear
what he had to say about the trip.
" 'Twasn't zctly fun, but we did see lots of
critters through the windows." Michael made a motion as if
he was terribly cold and Sarah was reminded of their trip over
the mountains. "Oh ya. We also saw the snow on the mountains."
"The Sierra's are some of the highest mountains
in the country. Snow falls on them many times during the year.
But I'll bet you've seen snow before living in Missouri."
"Yes, ma'am, we have. But the trees here are
different and the mountains are a lot bigger. And it was a might
colder, I'd say." Sarah looked to Michael. She was happy
to see him adjust to Charlotte so quickly. Maybe it was that she
looked so much like Ellie for him too.
"Tell me how your mother is doing. I hadn't
heard from her in over fifteen years until she wrote me about
you two," said Charlotte.
"When did Ma start writin' you?" Sarah looked into her
aunt's eyes with deep interest. She'd wondered all the way to
San Francisco how long her mother had planned their 'escape'.
Thinking a moment Charlotte finally said, "I
think it was about a year ago. Why do you ask?"
Sarrah's head went down immediately. "Curious
is all," she said, putting Michael off her lap. She motioned
for him to bring her the carpetbag and he ran to get it. She pulled
out a piece of hard candy that she'd purchased at one of their
stops and he gladly took it. Sarah smiled and Charlotte watched
in fascination.
Digging back into the bag she found what she was
looking for and pulled it out, handing it to Charlotte. "Ma
sencha this. I was told to give it to you ya as soon as we got
here." Charlotte took the letter from Sarah's shaking hands
and opened it carefully.
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